Long Crazy Road

my favorite part of Eclipse

2010-07-01T16:48:00.001-07:00

My favorite part of Eclipse: After the vampire battle, when the Volturi are coming through the woods, the TArdis lands right between the two groups of vampires, and Doctor Who comes out and reveals that they really aren't vampires, just a misunderstood alien race from another dimension, and then Amy Pond runs out of the Tardis and a newborn vampire bites her, and the Doctor had to find a way to cure her, but the only way to do that was for Edward to suck out the venom, but Edward was stuck in one of his awkward-pause speech loops and the Doctor realized that Edward is actually a robot, so the Doctor had to invent a machine that would do it. He saved Amy and offered to take the vampires back to their own planet, but they refused because they like ruling the world and enslaving humanity. The Cullens, being wimpy and all, decided they liked the idea, but when they tried to go inside the TARDIS, the Volturi shot lasers out of their eyes and blew them all up. They tried to shoot the Doctor and Amy, but he was able to reconfigure the sonic screwdriver to reflect back the eye-lasers and they blew themselves up.

oh...wait...that didn't really happen. I sort of blanked about about halfway through the movie and started making stuff up... LOL

Twilight: Eclipse, or why I nearly went insane last night

2010-07-01T12:35:00.001-07:00

My sister in law took me as a present for my birthday, which was yesterday....despite the fact that I generally avoid anything and everything Twilight related. And I still stand by that...that Cullens looked more plastic than ever--seriously, if they can do natural-looking pale makeup in OLD movies (yes, that movie is old to me LOL) like INterview with the Vampire, then you'd think Hollywood could manage it in modern times. They also did it at the end of New Moon wehn we see Bella running after Edward in the woods, post-change, in Alice's vision (although that is a kick-buttingly-cool CG filter). The thick, grainy, nonconforming 'pale' pancake makeup and horrific brassy blonde dye jobs looked horrible and uncomfortable. They looked like zombies trying to cover up the decay with cosmetics. You could see the makeup caked up at their hairlines.

The 'seduction' scene was...creepy, and the characters all kissed like they were told to make fish-lips and pulse their faces together. And there was just way too much slooooooow, head-pulsing kissing. I'm sorry, I've never kissed anybody and moved my head back and forth that much, and if anybody ever tried to kiss me like that, I told them to stop.

The 'witty' dialogue was so not witty, and I come to realize that both Pattinson and Stewart possess the acting range of potatoes. They, much like Megan Fox, cycle through the same three angst-ridden facial expressions: "Angst" "A little more angsty" and "Oh God the Emo is Killing Me Angsty". Stewart has slack-jawed expression on her face that reminds me of someone who has stewed their minds on crack for way too long. I expected her to start drooling at any moment. And the sad thing is, she acts like that in real life, if her interviews on the various tv shows are any indictation. Gollee, girl, GET OFF THE CRACK. The bloodless shattering battle...yikes. I was extremely glad I loaded up on tequila before I went into the theater. LOL

BUt, all that being said, the production values in this chapter of the 'saga' were much better than the others, and the soundtrack is just as good as the previous two. And the girl that played Bree Tanner was so, so flippin' cute.

And I learned a valuable lesson. I hate teenage girls. I'm giving my girls away when they turn 13. LOL.

Back from Romantic Times!

2010-05-03T15:22:00.000-07:00

It was lots of fun! I think it was one of the more productive conventions I've attended. I sat next to Karen Rose at the bookfair. I love her. She's so funny and nice. I pitched to an agent and turned into a babbling fool. Didn't help that one of the Mr. Romance competitors stood behind the agent making faces at me while I tried to pitch! But the agent asked for a partial and a synopsis, so maybe I wasn't too spastic and whacked out.

Cool thing- when I got home, I got a phone call from a graphic design place I applied to! Interview tomorrow!

I did it.

2010-04-13T12:00:00.000-07:00

I got the spray tan. I'm slightly splotchy, have a big poop-colored stain on the outside edge of my right palm, and have a very dark patch that makes the shadow between my cleavage look dirty, but I'm tan. I have a tan butt. That's very interesting to me. I have never seen my ass anything but a white to bright and pristine it was virtually pearly. Bad news is it only lasts about 7 days, so I have to keep redoing it. So they say. I'm lazy and broke most of the time, so I'm only doing this for special occasions.

Romantic Times Booklovers Con will be one of those special times. You betcha I'll be there, and be tan!

I'm going to be pitching Winterborn with a passion. I hope to get there and be able to sign up for an appointment with MElissa Ann Singer of Tor, because she's looking for horror and her schedule for Friday is open. I think I'm going to fire off a query to her ahead of time.

I'm sitting at Panera BRead watching this woman cut up her salad. She's been cutting up this same salad for about ten minutes now. She has completely shredded it. I wonder why? Another woman just walked by on wedge heels so high she wobbled when she walked. Why? You KNOW it's uncomfortable.

I'm almost done with my research paper for english class. I'm doing it on modern feminism and the nbegative influence of gynocentric or militant feminism on the movement as a whole. Yeah, lemme tell ya, it's a lot harder than it seems!

Sunday night

2010-04-04T21:24:00.001-07:00

Happy Easter, everybody. Did you eat as much caramel-filled candy as I did? Bet you didn't. And me supposedly trying to lose weight for Romantic Times BL Convention! (do you hear my derisive laughter?)

Nothing on TV to watch tonight except for old Futurama reruns. No big deal though. I love this show. I'd tattoo the cast on my ass, if I had the money. The Futurama cast on one side, LUR included, and the Simpson's on the other side. Yes. My ass is big enough to hold both casts.

I'm debating if I want to get a tan the old-fashioned, dangerous way (the sun) or if I want to pony up the cash for a spray tan. My laziness dictates option B, but my wallet says option A.

I read Dahlia Roddy's (Dalia Rody?) latest Medallion Press book. I can't remember the title. It took a full half of the book to fully capture my interest. It wasn't a bad story, just a little complicated, and the reason for the 'black out' was hard to really grasp. The structure of the story was very 'The Stand'-like, although I thought Roddy had a good theory about post-apocalyptic society a few years in, economically. The ending was a little anticlimactic and it almost felt rushed, like things happened just because it was time to end the book rather than when the story dictated it should end.

Will have a review up at PRetty-Scary and SwampDweller at some point this week.

I'm plotting out a couple of horror novels. I need to write something that I can submit to an agent! Winterborn is with Sandy Lu of the L. Perkins Agency, so I'm hoping to hear back from her soon. It's getting close to the 12 weeks she said it would take. I have two story options-- one Rosemary's Baby-ish, but with aliens. I want to write about aliens, for some reason. Ideas been done, but I hope to have a unique spin on it. It's been a while since I've read a book with that theme. Another idea is sort of a sci-fi horror novel, in the vein of Total Recall (and other Philip K. Dick stories), but not quite. I have that one fleshed out pretty well, and the other I'm going to work on tomorrow while I'm ignoring my math teacher (and failing the class...LOL).

Wednesday

2010-03-31T12:07:00.001-07:00

Finally wrote the ishy squishy love scene in Dark Consort. I've actually written about four of them so far. It has to happen in the book, but I'm having trouble PLACING it. It's a little frustrating.

I got a new eHarmony match today. One of his 'must haves' is his partner must be considered very attractive by society. Uh...why'd he want to get matched with me? I'm the epitome of NOT considered attractive by society! *laughs* But I have really awesome boobs, so it's not an issue.

The Romantic Times Booklover's convention is coming up. IN like four weeks. I had this goal of losing 15 pounds by then, but I think I'm going to settle for fitting into my size 14's comfortable. Yeah. Must easier. I'll save the major weight loss thing for post-RT, for Josh and Renee's wedding and the CONtext and AAD this summer.

I've got some new rules for art commissions now. I got stiffed, again, so there goes my natural good nature. From now on, for commissions under $100, I get paid up front. Over $100, pay half up front. I will not send watermark-free files until the second half of payment is in my account.

Wow.

2010-03-27T21:45:00.001-07:00

I wish I wrote this book: And Falling, Fly by Skyler White

http://www.amazon.com/Falling-Fly-Skyler-White/dp/0425232344/ref=sr_1_1?ie=UTF8&s=books&qid=1269751456&sr=8-1

It has got to be the single most elegant, gorgeous, amazingly written book I've ever read.

Look for an official review of the book at www.pretty-scary.net soon!

Buy one get one frreeee! Who doesn't love free ebooks??

2010-03-25T11:30:00.000-07:00

If you buy my latest novel, Winterborn, I'll send you a free e-copy of any of the my other novels!! You can purchase Winterborn HERE.

What else have I written?

Swamp Baby

Curse, crazies, and cannibals, oh my!!
Suwannee lives in mortal fear of the swamp that borders her home. Generations of her family have been lost in the depths. Every night it calls to her, beckons her. Although her best friend Derry promises he won’t let anything ever happen to her, she wonders if she’ll ever be free of the deadly swamp’s siren song.

Michael loves the swamp with a passion, one that rivals that for his ex-wife. While she cowers in the shadow of the wetlands, he embraces it. When a vicious entity offers him an unimaginable power, he
seizes it, despite the horrible sacrifice he must make.

Before Michael can help Spirit-Mother claim Suwannee, something else from the swamp does. Derry and Michael join forces to rescue Suwannee from the horrors of Hertley’s Swamp, but will Derry be strong enough to defy his brother and save the woman he’s come to love?

Spirit-Mother: Devotion (the sequel to Swamp Baby--readable as a standalone novel!)

Five years after the horrific events in Hertley's Swamp, Derry is about to sell the Swamp Baby. Suwannee is still crazy, locked up in an institution, and Michael is still dead. Supposedly...

SPirit-Mother isn't happy that her sacrifice was stolen, and she's out to reclaim her prize. When horror returns to Hertley's Swamp and spreads beyond, Derry and a group of ragtag new friends must work together to save the entire state of Florida--if not the world! Suwannee is the key to salvation, but can Derry make the sacrifice?

Muse

Too good to be true.
After ten years, Miguel rushes to Leah’s rescue. When she truly needed him, he wasn’t there for her and she can’t forgive him. Despite their deep, psychic connection, she can’t find it in herself to forget. Even as they begin their new lives together, she can’t shake the fear he’ll disappear again.

He calls La Mariposa his Muse.

The vengeful spirit is out for blood. After several violent attacks against Leah, both she and her brother-in-law are convinced there is more to Miguel’s ‘ghost’ than anyone knows. As they struggle to uncover the truth, past resentments flare to life. An old rivalry sparks, but will their mutual love for Miguel dampen the flames before it’s too late to save the man they both love?

When terrible, bloody secrets are revealed…

Will Leah be strong enough to save Miguel? To save him, she has to face herself and what lurks inside her heart is the worst enemy of all.

A Year of You

The con was supposed to be simple. Get in, get the money, and get out. But the family that rejected Mattie has dark secrets, and someone will kill to keep her silent!

Boomp ba-da-ba-da

2010-03-24T20:56:00.000-07:00

I'm watching The Stand right now. It's the final part. I forgot how good (and corny) the movie is. And how incredibly ridiculous the floating Mother Abigail head is at the end. The montage of fallen survivors, though, I like. I LOVED Rob Lowe in this movie. I was in love with him for a long time (well, his character, more like it).

I read Shaun Jeffrey's DeadFall today. Took me all of an hour. It's amazing how easy it is to zone out while you're tramping away on a treadmill at a +10 incline. I love my ebook reader because I don't have to hold it open while trying to hang on to the top of blasted treadmill so I don't bounce off backwards at a steep incline.

Anyway, the book is awesome. It's a little heavy on the Resident Evil similarities, but it's good nonetheless. Since writing an original zombie novel is impossible, the true test of merit is in retelling the same old story, and how a writer can make it their own. Shaun definitely succeeded, even if Amber Redgrave reminded me quite a bit of Claire Redfield. I definitely recommend it. Shaun's writing voice is very engaging and you'll be captivated by the story very quickly. It's an easy, fun read. Go buy it! I don't have a buy-now link, so go to his website and check him out. http://www.shaunjeffrey.com/

I also finished Jill Marie Landis's novel, Heart of Stone. It's an inspirational historical romance. Pretty good. I enjoyed it. It's about a former prostitute who has turned her life around and made something of herself. She's content until the local preacher-man starts sniffing around. She's terrified of her past catching up with her and she's determined not to let her past tarnish his future. Landis's writing is beautiful--very flowing and smooth. She has a talent for description and characterization. I especially liked Laura's (the heroine) attitude toward Brand's (the hero) kids. She wasn't all motherly and mushy-gushy.

The book stalled for a little while in the middle. I felt like Laura just needed to suck it up and get over her hard-heartedness a little quicker. It got old after a while and I was getting antsy for some interaction between the hero and heroine that wasn't Laura completely rebuffing Brand's attentions. Other than that, it's a GREAT book and I recommend it! Her website is http://jillmarielandis.com/

If you're a fan of dark speculative fiction, horror movies, music, art, and books, check out www.pretty-scary.net. It's a place for women in horror, run by women in horror. We're there to support and encourage women in a genre that's dominated by our male counterparts. We rock, basically. YOu'll love us! Stop by and hang out on the forums for a while. You'll find some new friends, I promise! MEN are welcome--but if we get a whiff of excess testosterone, we won't hesitate to go feminist on your ass! Love us, support us, enjoy us, but RESPECT us!

WOO! Great review for Winterborn!

2010-03-23T21:46:00.000-07:00

It's from Novel Musings Book Reviews!

With every book, you get reviews. Some are good, some are not so good. For me, personally, there's always just one that stands out above the others. So far, this one is it!

Winterborn
A.D. Roland
Winterborn is one of those novels that upon reading the first couple of pages you begin to wonder to yourself “hmm, I hope this story isn’t going to be the same as all the other horror/thriller stories I’ve read in the last few years”. Don’t worry with every passing page A.D. Roland pulls in details and elements common in other stories in the genre and creates an a verifiable nightmare that is unique in and of itself. A story that is sure to leave you spell bound well past the last turn of the page.

The story begins 18 years prior to the main story arc where a group of 4 teenage friends have decided to sneak into the old Wraithborne Estate. Local legend has the mansion being haunted and is the #1 make out spot for young lovers. Their visit starts off bad and goes down hill fast as they find that the police officer keeping on eye on the house has been brutally killed, followed by a strange creature that scares them into the mansion and comes in after them. The terror only ends when an ancient wasted woman attacks Sharla causing her to lose consciousness.

This dark tale picks up with Tamsyn, an artist her husband Sean and his bastard child Kevin having recently moved back into his family’s home which just happens to be the original house of the caretakers of the Wraithborne Estate. The family dynamics quickly turn dark as you learn that Kevin’s mother is Sharla, the young lady attacked those many years ago, and that Sean was having an affair with her for most of his marriage with Tamsyn. Tamsyn only recently learning this information has resorted to drugs to cope with her feelings and marriage issues.

What follows is a psychological nightmare of monsters, demons, and magic that at first appear to the be the hallucinations of a deranged, drug addicted mind that slowly reveals itself to be a dark and horrifying reality. This story will continue to surprise you as each twist and turn in the plot unravels leaving you doubting what you know and just what evil lerks at the Wraithborne Estate.

A.D. Roland captivates your attention by spinning realistic characters rich in emotion and history. One of the most refreshing aspect of her writing is that both Sean and Tamsyn have very complex personalities and both play a major role in the plot. Due to this there are a few events that leave you doubting who the actual lead character is making it very difficult for the reader to know what is going to happen. In some cases A.D. Roland flipped the outcome of events to be the complete opposite of my expectations making the story all the more enjoyable.

Throughout the story we are introduced to many supporting characters, however their part in the story is restricted to when they interact with the lead characters. This enables some very central characters do not make there initial appearance until the end of the novel, leaving the reader to learn the underlying plot only when the character themselves learn it.

Winterborn will drag you along a dark and haunting road through the live of a psychologically damaged mind. You will enjoy every jarring minute as the line between reality, the supernatural, and hallucinations blur leaving you lost as to what demons A.D. Roland will unleash next.

You can buy Winterborn at www.allromanceebooks.com, and you can find excerpts in older blogposts!

AAAAAArrrttt

2010-03-23T20:55:00.001-07:00

Art. Love it. Love seeing it, love making it. I have spent the last few years working on digital techniques, photoshop and all that jazz. It's fun and I love, it but somethign Billy Tackett said to me at a convention has stuck with me. "The computer is a tool."

So Over the last couple of years, I've tried to balance the digital art with traditional mediums. I am never far from a drawing pad (better texture, vs a sketch pad) and graphite or charcoal. I prefer woodless graphite. A little messier, but you can get such a variation in line and shade! When I started school again, I made sure to register for as many art classes as possible. You can see my work in my deviantart account. www.asharceneaux.deviantart.com.

I still love digital art. After spending three years working solely on book covers, I'm doing my own digital art now. I've done some horror themed stuff, and I'm about to start a gothic-cover-art-themed series. Check it out! Again, the link is www.asharceneaux.deviantart.com.

Hey everybody!

2010-03-14T15:28:00.000-07:00

How's it going? Good here. Sorry about the no posting...I started school and things have been innssssaaannneee! I'm only taking three classes, but one of those is an art class that takes up six hours a week. Doesn't seem like a lot until you're sitting on an art donkey with an artboard on your thighs for three hours a day, twice a week! It's a lot of fun, though. I've been posting my assignments to my deviantart account, so you can see my progress.

Winterborn came out in December, and literally the day after it went live, I got an email from an agent I forgot I'd queried, wanting to see a partial! So while it's for sale, the print release is on hold until I hear back from the agent. As much as I love WB and want to see it in print, having a chance to get my work in front of an agent is worth delaying the print, even if that means I won't have a new release with me at Romantic Times this year.

I just found out I'm going to be FEATURED in The Horror Zine in their May issue! I'm so excited. They've featured some kick-ass artists, and it's an honor to be up there with them! I have a new loosely-connected series that they'll post in their ezine-- you can get a sneak peak at it by checking out my dA gallery. www.asharceneaux.deviantart.com.

On the writing front. Wow. I had a short story I was fleshing out a little bit for TEase Publishing's Unseelie anthology. Laugh with me, now. The story began as an 8k word short. Now, it's stretched waaaaaay out to this 62k word and growing epic fantasy. *facepalm*

BUt I LOVE this story. It features two of my favorite characters, half-Seelie Kaeda, a feisty healer mage, and Ceron, the cold-hearted half-Unseelie king of a damned nation who manipulates her into coming to his castle. He claims her as his consort, and even though he's a total ass, she sees the beauty hidden behind the beast. Cast out by her own people--who change their mind when they realize she's nearly fae royalty, Kaeda searches for a purpose in life and finds it when she learns she can break the curse that binds Ceron and his dying lands.

I'm hoping to wrap that story up in time to pitch at RT this year. In addition to Dark Consort, I have another book, a contemporary inspirational women's fiction novel called 'Something Beautiful', about a quarter finished.

I keep telling myself I should write just one genre. I don't know though...I have so many stories to tell!!

All right, kids are home from their 'sperm donor's' house, so I'm out.

Check out www.rorreviews.wordpress.com and www.swampdweller.wordpress.com for new book reviews!

Ash

Winterborn is available now!

2010-01-15T12:45:00.000-08:00

Winterborn is available now in eformat at http://www.allromanceebooks.com/product-winterborn-401248-140.html !

Here's the blurb!

Plagued by vivid, violent hallucinations, a recovering drug addict desperately seeks the truth. Are her waking nightmares a product of her self-medicating, or dire supernatural warnings?

Tamsyn Hallert, an artist, exists in a vicious circle of addiction and recovery, fueled by her husband Sean’s long-time secret affair. The affair ended in his lover's bizarre suicide, but not before she left a surprise on Tam and Sean’s doorstep—Kevin, the son Sean never knew he had.

Sean moves them to the country, to his familial home near the crumbling Wraithborne Estate, the massive old house with a terrible mythos. The twisted attempt to save their marriage only makes matters worse as Sean’s obsession with his dead lover deepens, and Tam’s grip on reality grows more tenuous. A horrific plot to summon the dark spirits that possess the Estate comes to light, with Tam, Sean, and Kevin in the center of it all. Will Tam be able to save her family, or will the lure of the spirits’ promises be too strong to resist?

******

Read my older posts for more excerpts!

"Carriers" movie review

2009-12-19T23:42:00.000-08:00

This movie gets 5 stars for Chris Pine alone!

Carriers is about a group of friends struggling to survive in a world stricken by a deadly plague. As they travel cross-county to seek refuge at an old, isolated beachside hotel, they have to figure what is the biggest enemy--the flu or themselves?

Carriers takes some hints from a lot of post-apocalyptic films. There's no stealing or ripping off; this movie applied the 'lessons' learned regarding battling viruses that have no cure and keeping one's loved ones safe from the rotten part of humanity.

There's a little bit of social commentary regarding the way we isolate ourselves from one another, and the more blatant avian/swine flu references, but it's negligible, and the viewer can easily get lost in Chris Pine's eyes once more...

The movie starts with Brian, his girlfriend Bobby, Brian's brother Danny, and his platonic friend Kate, cruising along, musing about the rhetoric of breaking rules when there's no one to enforce them. They come across a stranded father (Yum-tastic Christopher Meloni from Law and Order: SVU) and his infected daughter. Confrontation ensues, and they all end up traveling toward a supposed safe haven, with the infected kid and her dad in the back of the SUV behind plastic.

Bobby breaks one of Chris's rules. Rather than own up, she hides it, and tension erupts between all four when they begin to contemplate loss and love and being completely alone in a dying world.All through the first half of the movie, Kate barely speaks, barely responds. At a makeshift memorial, something visibly clicks inside her head. There's a shift in action when wall-flower, mousy Kate suddenly usurps the alpha-bitch position.

I loved the subtly of that ease into power. Granted, I hated what Kate's character became by the end of the movie, but the way her passive-aggressive tendencies came out and influenced everything that happened. She wanted to survive. It wasn't until the worst happened that she realized that. She acknowledged her losses, finally, and grabbed ahold of what was left. Control and Danny. While Danny didn't let her control him directly, sweet, quiet Kate turned into a manipulative hootch.

Chris Pine took Brian's character--the requisite brute of average intelligence that plows through everything with a bottle of beer in one hand and a smart-ass remark in the other--and did a remarkable job in this movie. Piper Perabo played Bobby, and the chemistry between the two of them felt natural and made the group dynamics so much deeper. There's a moment during the movie when you just groan, Oh no, not that!

Carriers will stick with you. It's not scary, not much of a thriller, although it's got some tense scenes and a really gross dog scene, this movie is a great example of character development, and of a character-driven story.

Chris Pine did an awesome job as Captain Kirk, and with this movie, he's gained another sturdy foothold.

"Deadline" movie review

2009-12-19T23:36:00.000-08:00

Everyone who had a role in this movie was obviously instructed to do everything in 1/2 time. Walking, talking, moving, breathing... The director, producers, and anyone involved in the making of this film need to back AWAY from the Shamalayan project reject pile. The movie had potential. That potential died about 45 seconds in. I appreciate a slow, artsy thriller. This? This was a waste of film, time, and money. And collagen (good grief, at the height at which Britney Murphy's lips are swollen! She went straight from the doctor to the set!). Murphy picked a stinker this time. She played her character well--the nutjob stressed out by a domestic violence incident, deadlines, and hiding her lesbian tendencies, but that was about the only decent thing about this movie. SPOILER ALERT! (not that it matters!) I love movies with a good twist. Those of you who swear there's a twist, you people got it all wrong. there IS no twist. Perhaps there MIGHT be, but it's a lack of good screenwriting that destroys the twist before it has time to even curve.

Obviously, ALice is nuts. She's concocted this entire story--which is obvious when the other girl reads the script at the end. It's a word for word play of what has 'happened' to Alice--all in her head. Then, at the very end, with parts lost somewhere in another plothole, you see that Alice has been obsessing over the ambiguous lesbian friend--filming her while she sleeps and saying creepy things.

The director wants you to THINK it's a supernatural thriller, that there are ghosts, etc, but it's just a movie about a schizoid chick. It's completely botched by the lack of a good writer/s. This could have been pulled off, ala Secret Window, but...as I said, BAD WRITING. It's not the ending that's slapped on or badly written, it's the bulk of the story that isn't fleshed out. They focused on cinematography and atmosphere, rather than in storytelling.

Could have been a good movie. Even for a Murphy flick! (dear Lord, we haven't forgotten the abomination that is "Ramen Girl", have we?)

Book trailer for Winterborn finally ready!

2009-12-05T21:02:00.000-08:00

Check this out...I'm pretty proud of it! It's not perfect, but it's the results of playing with Photoshop and Flash for nearly seven hours. Check it out!

Excerpt from Winterborn- Chapter 1

2009-10-16T19:55:00.000-07:00

Blue lights flashed once, twice, in Tamsyn’s rearview mirror. She froze, every muscle in her body going tight and hard from fear. The static grinding forth from the radio speakers was as gray as the sky overhead. She flicked the dial and silenced the radio. One hand fumbled for her wallet. Her fingers touched the cold brass box that held her salvation, her chemical normality-inducer. She pushed it deeper into her purse.

She chomped down on her bottom lip hard enough to hurt and pulled over. The patrol car pulled up behind her, angled slightly on the shoulder of the road. The deputy shifted behind the wheel, barely visible through a particularly bright reflection of the sun opened the door.

I’m so frickin’ high, he’ll know the second he looks at me. She ate pills to stay normal, most days, but today, she took more than ever. Some days, existing just hurt too much. Twelve years of lies cut pretty deep, left too many wounds. Way more than time could ever heal.

I’m high and he’ll know.

The deputy adjusted his aviator glasses—corny idiot, she thought—and sauntered to her door. She rolled the window down. The crank took all her strength to force around, down.

The tall, lean cop braced one hand on the roof of the car and stared at her. She couldn’t see his eyes through the dark glasses, but she felt his glare.

He knows he knows he knows!

“You know how fast you were going, ma’am?” He spoke with the stereotypical ominous drawl all movie bad-guy cops adopted.

“Few miles over the limit, I think.” She spoke carefully, even though she knew exactly how fake it sounded. The cop’s eyebrows twitched, lowered. She still couldn’t see his eyes, and that freaked her out more than anything. His thin lips tightened into a white slash.

“Step out of the car, ma’am.”

Tam’s stomach dropped to her feet. The cop backed away from the car so she could push it open. She rose from her seat and stepped out, to the side. The cop slammed the car door.

He flicked his glasses up so they sat on the top of his head. Bright blue eyes pierced through the haze of Tam’s thoughts. “Do you have any weapons on your person?”

“Why don’t you check and see?” she challenged. The cop’s right eyebrow perked up. He gripped her shoulder and spun her around, pushing her against the side of the car. He stepped up close, his body heat biting through the nipping cold. His hands started at her shoulders and moved down, squeezing, kneading, taking way too many liberties. Over her hips, down her legs, between her legs—

He pressed against her, wrapping his arms around her chest and slid his hands underneath her shirt. His hot, moist hands against her cool skin triggered a shiver she couldn’t suppress. Close, he chuckled, a low sound that vibrated in her ear. Electric sensations shot through her body, heart to groin, bringing layers of goosebumps to her skin.

“Sean, somebody could see us—” she gasped, breaking the rules by using his name. His lips, hot and damp and busy kissing the back of her neck, paused.

“Babe, we’re on a semi-private road in the middle of nowhere, that only leads to two places. Our house, and the Estate.”

She twisted around in his arms and braced her forearms on his chest. She squeezed his shoulders lightly, tugging him closer so she could whisper in his ear.

“The dashboard camera, doofus.”

He dodged away from her, cursing. “Damn it. You know what, it’s fine. It’s all right.”

Tam crossed her arms over her chest and cocked her hip. “Yeah, it’ll be fine when you get written up again. You’ve had your probation extended how many times now?” She licked her lips, tasted him. “Come here, Sean.” She held out her arms. “They know we’re married and they know we’re having…trouble. If anything, you can play the psychological distress card and ask for counseling. Or whatever.”

Sean shook his head and stalked back to his cruiser. “Just make sure you’re waiting for Kev. I don’t want him walking home.”

Tam heaved a sigh. A numbing slosh of medicinal calmness dampened her irritation. Love those Oxys. Time-release, yeah baby! “Yeah, yeah, I know. Some boogeyman from the Estate might get him.”

“It’s a long walk for a ten-year old.”

“He’s almost eleven.”

“Once again, it’s a long walk.”

“Don’t worry, Sean. I’ll be right there waiting for your—” She clamped her lips shut on the word bastard and said instead, saccharine-sweetly, “son when he gets off the bus.”

He gazed at her suspiciously. He opened his mouth to say something, but his radio interrupted him. “I have to go. Just be there, okay?”

“Dude, I’m there every day. I’ve never missed in the however-flippin’-many months we’ve been here.” She flounced back into her car and gunned the engine, pulled back on the road. All around the car, the wind gusted hard enough to make it shudder. With clenched teeth, Tamsyn worked the brake pedal. The wind made her nervous.

She flicked the radio knob. “...with wind chill around twenty-five degrees, it’s going to be a coooold night!” The DJ rambled on about the low chance for rain. “Don’t pack the shorts away yet, folks, it’s going to warm up with highs in the low seventies.”

After almost a year in Railley, she still found the DJs and newscasters unfamiliar. The same with the layout of the local Wal-Mart, the way grocery stores always seemed backwards. Sean shrugged off her homesickness and told her she would get used to it. And she knew she would, eventually, but that didn't stop her from missing the little town where she grew up, on Florida's West Coast. The worst part of it was the not-so-subtle, slow, withdrawal of the man she had loved for the last twelve years.

Tam sighed and glanced at the dashboard clock. She had spent longer than she intended to in the art supply store. In twenty minutes, Kevin would be getting off the bus at the foot of the private road that wound past the massive old Wraithborne Estate to their house, the renovated overseer's house.

Maybe it wasn't nutso. His fears were well-founded. When he was sixteen, some psycho had viciously murdered his uncle, three teenagers, and nearly killed his best friend. Sharla, who grew up as twisted as they could come, ended up seducing Sean into an eleven-year-plus affair. She offed herself a year earlier, but not until she'd dropped a lil' present on their doorstep.

Kevin. Nearly eleven. Holding folded, rumpled, waterstained paternity tests results that confirmed Sean was his father.

Her buzz began to wear off. A good high from the Oxycontin would last a good six or eight hours. Should last more, but taking twelve or so a day upped her tolerance. Wouldn’t hurt to pop another.

“Wait for Kevin.” Tam rolled her eyes. “Kevin, Kevin, Kevin.” Her fingers slipped into the open mouth of her purse and touched the cool, textured surface of the pillbox. Thinking about Kevin just made her sick.

She pulled out the little metal box and flipped it open. Seven pills lay in the bottom, vibrating slightly from the movement of the car and the subtle pulse in her leg.

She picked one out and held it at her lips. Sean hated the pills and she'd sworn to him she was off of them. So she lied...it was his fault she was on them, anyway. Not that he believed her, when she said she was off. He knew what she acted like when she detoxed, and then when she was off.

She rolled her eyes. Deputy Hawkeye there didn’t even notice how blitzed I am!

At home, she crushed and snorted the powder. The high hit quicker, though it didn’t last as long. But she saved that for the days when the mess of her life seemed too tangled to sort out.

Tam opened her mouth, ready to let the narcotic drop to her tongue, when a figure in a bright red jacket caught her eye, standing just inside the rusted remains of the cast iron fence that separated the Wraithborne Estate from the rest of the world.

She slammed on brakes. The pillbox flew off her lap and the contents scattered all over the driver's side floorboards. Cursing under her breath, she tucked the pill she still clutched between her thumb and index finger into the pocket of her jacket, and drove the car onto the shoulder of the road. The wind threatened to tear the car door from her hand as she stepped out.

“Kevin!” she screamed over the roar of the wind. The kid in the red jacket took off away from the fence, lacing his way through the sparse woods. “No, Kevin! Get back here!” She hit the fence with her palm and ran a few steps down, hands fluttering over the ornate iron rods, seeking a way in. Whip-thin weeds slapped at her ankles. Brambly growths snagged her capri tights. What the hell is the kid doing in the woods, on the main Estate grounds?

If the bus let him off early, he knew to head down the road to the renovated cottage. He knew Sean didn't want him out here. Even talking about coming out to the main house started trouble.

A big brick pillar protruded from the overgrown woods and brush. Tam tore away the biggest branch, relieved to see enough broken bricks in the pillar to allow her to scale it. She wedged the toes of her foot into the crevice of some broken bricks and hauled herself up. The old, grainy bricks dug into her fingers. Her knee scraped against the surface. The skin ripped and blood ran down her leg, cooling in the chilly air. The wind whipped, demon-driven, around her, catching in her jacket and hair like icy hands.

“Kevin!” She could still see him, dodging through the trees, running even deeper into the woods. The wind blew harder, slapping branches into her face and tangling in her hair. Just as Kevin disappeared from her sight, the bricks she clutched with her left hand crumbled and gave way, dumping her to the ground. Shards of brick rained down on her. Before she could raise her arms to shield her face, a chunk of red brick sliced her cheek.

The wind tasted her blood and died away after one last, sharp gust left her gasping. Shivering, she pushed herself upright.

“Kevin,” she puffed. “Kevin!”

Sean would hate her if something happened to him. She would hate herself if she hurt Sean by not taking care of his child. Before she could dwell on that new can of worms, she forced herself back to the present. Past hurts were past hurts. What did she have the drugs for, if not to dull everything, to make her forget?

She levered herself to her feet and ran back to her car. With the pedal to the metal, she hauled ass for the main gate. Although Sean had made her swear she wouldn't ever go onto the main property--

As if he actually cares!

--she didn't hesitate to park outside the gate and squeeze through the narrow gap between the two sides. Although someone had tried to fix the gates a few times, they couldn't get the two wings to meet perfectly. An off-duty cop guarded the place on Halloween and certain pagan holidays. A reputation for being some great spot to contact spirits clung to the Estate like a parasite.

Skeletal shadows thrown by long-dead oaks fell over the long driveway beyond the main gate. Patchwork pieces of pale sand and black dirt surrounded crunchy dry grass. A tiny brown bird swooped down out of the dead trees and snatched a worm from the grass. The sudden burst of movement startled Tam.

“Kevin! Where are you?” Her voice echoed back to her. “Come on, kid! Your dad is going to kill us!”

“You have no idea...”

Stifling a short shriek, Tam whipped around. The unfamiliar voice sounded right over her shoulder. She stared into the thin shadows formed by the wide boles of the trees and the dense, overgrown shrubbery. Crows cawed from the bare treetops.

Chills raced up and down her spine. Overhead, thunder rumbled. Two cold drops of rain splattered on her left cheek. She touched the moisture with her fingertips. The wind gusted, cold and sharp. Shivering, she wrapped her jacket tighter around her body. Stupid, wearing the knee-length skirt and my thinnest jacket in this weather! As cold as the air felt on her exposed skin, she figured no way the temp rise to high-sixties tomorrow, like the forecaster promised. This is Florida. I don't know crap about cold weather.

“Kevin, I swear, I will ground you for the rest of the year if you don't answer me!” She stomped her foot. “I mean it!”

The kid's usual answer floated up out of her memory. “You're not my mother!”

“Thank God,” she said aloud, even though she only said the shameful mantra it in the sanctity of her mind before now.

Something big crashed around in the woods to her right. She jerked sideways, staring into the trees. Adrenaline shot through her body like a wave of ice water. Her muscles tingled and went numb from fear. Cold sweat broke out on her body, chilling her even further.

“K-Kevin?”

On the left side of the driveway, a branch fell from the top of a tree and a murder of crows took flight, swirling and dipping around her head in a frenzy. Crying out, Tam covered her head and ran back toward the gate.

“Mine.” The voice stopped her dead in her tracks. The crows vanished, dissolved into a lazy drift of leaves that fluttered to the ground around her. “They're both mine.”

With her heart nearly flatlining from the adrenaline flooding her system, she turned around. In the middle of the path, just a few yards away, a woman stared at her with huge, bloodshot blue eyes. Long blond hair parted in the middle fell around her face, all the way to her ribs. Red streaks glimmered vibrant in the gray afternoon. Bright crimson droplets fell from the ends of her hair and soaked into the fraying fabric of her vest.

Tam caught her breath when she realized the stuff on the girl’s short denim skirt and faded pink tights was blood. Handprints, splotches, splatters, streaks. So much blood! Tam stared, morbidly fascinated. The neon-pink vest's white insulation, grayed from exposure and age, hung out in matted clumps.

“A-are you okay?” Tam asked, backing up a step. The girl, a teenager, sixteen, eighteen at the most, looked like death. Ice blue lips stood out against skin the same gray color as the sky. Tam couldn’t look away from the dull, dry eyes. She aged as Tam watched. The lines around her mouth deepened, just like the crow's feet at the corners of her eyes.

Tam took another step back. “My husband's a cop. He's just down the road. I-I'm going to get him and be right back. Just stay here.”

This is a hallucination, Tam. Turn around and it'll be gone. Blink, breathe. Just your head, screwing with you.

The girl took a step forward. “I already had him,” she said with a voice like velvet on sandpaper. This was no hallucination. Tam knew hallucinations. She'd been plagued with them since her first trip down the rabbit hole. The girl standing in front of her aged in a split second. The lines around her mouth deepened. The crows' feet at the corners of her eyes darkened. In seconds, she transformed into the woman Tam despised most, the woman Tam blamed for everything wrong in the last twelve years.

Sharla.

Tam turned and ran, forgetting about Kevin, thinking only of getting away from a woman who had been dead for a year.

Orphan

2009-07-25T15:40:00.000-07:00

I went and saw it last night. It's definitely more a thriller than a horror movie. One thing people keep thinking as they go in to see it is that it's a movie about an evil kid. By the end of the movie, you will realize it's not that kind of movie at all.

I absolutely loved the makeup job on the 'kid' at the end of the movie. They really managed to do it very convincingly. You'll see, when you see the movie. The acting is pretty good. The characters were perfect for the movie. The asshole, former cheater husband, the mother who has had some psychological issues, the suspicious older son, and the adorable little daughter. And, of course, the psycho adoptee.

It was well shot and well written. Some things seemed to go off on a tangent, and while nothing was left unexplained, occasionally the explanation was a little weak.

I think the worst part of the movie was the theater experience. The theater was FRIGID. The seat had this wierd, damp sensation, and three teenage girls who sat in front of me giggled and whispered the whole time, and of course shrieked and giggled at what they imagined were jump scenes. It was rather annoying.

Book video trailer for "The Haunting of Sam Cabot"

2009-07-17T15:43:00.000-07:00

Check out this trailer I made for MArk Edward HAll's newest book, The Haunting of Sam Cabot.

http://vids.myspace.com/index.cfm?fuseaction=vids.individual&videoid=60651318

Excerpt from my new novel, Winterborn

2009-07-16T16:09:00.000-07:00

A cool breeze chilled the sweat on Tam's brow. Slowly, she opened her eyes to a bright blue sky, white clouds, and winter-faded trees. The day glowed bright and crisp, unmarred. Tam breathed in slowly and spat in the dirt a few times to clear her mouth of bitter bile. The taste remained. She had water bottles in the fridge. Her throat burned, and the just-vomited feeling coated her teeth and tongue.

But the car was just a few yards away, and she didn't feel like dragging Kevin back in the house and then back out. If she remembered correctly, there was a water bottle in the floorboard of the car, an unopened one.

She marched Kevin to the car and ordered him to get in. After a short protest, he got in and slammed the door. Tam hit the button on her keychain that made the doors lock. At ten years old, the car's electronic entry system shorted out in the passenger door and only opened from the outside after anyone pushed the lock button.

“Strap in.”

He glared at her from under his too-long bangs.

“Quick being a brat and strap in.”

Kevin turned his head and stared out the window, arms crossed over his chest.

With a weary sigh, Tam reached over and grabbed the seat belt. Before she could pull it across his narrow body, he leaned forward and grabbed her arm with both hands. He chomped down on the fleshy part of her forearm, grinding his teeth through her flesh as he tore away a mouthful. He growled and went for seconds. His teeth pierced muscle like razors.

Tam screamed and punched him in the side of the head. He growled like an animal and just dug in deeper. She had a terrifying though; if she jerked her arm away, she would rip another hunk of her arm away. If she didn't he would eat her alive. Blood pulsed around his mouth and ran down his chin, where it dripped into his lap.

She heard someone screaming. Why wouldn't they shut up?

Oh, it's me. He had the strength of two grown men. Nothing she did even loosened his grip in the slightest.

Kevin's fingers dug into her arm like talons. The pain was unbearable! She stopped trying to pry his mouth away from her arm and slugged him in the side of the head again. And again.

With the third blow his grip loosened enough for the snatch her arm away.

She couldn't stop screaming. Her voice grated, cracked, until the only sound coming out of her mouth were harsh, painful grunts. Kevin bared his teeth at her, bloody lips peeled back like a mad dog's. Blood—her blood—ran down his chin and soaked into his shirt.

His teeth narrowed, sharpened. His eyes widened and his pupils turned into slits of black. Reptilian. Evil. The tiny veins in the whites of his eyes pulsed visibly, thickening. Blood welled up like tears and ran down his face. His skin paled, cracked.

Tam cried out and flung herself against the door. Locked, it held.

Something on the outside flung itself against the other side of the door.

She opened her eyes and saw the monstrous thing that had stalked her the night before, staring in, snarling. Drool ran down long, yellowed fangs. Bits of past meals hung in the gaps between the teeth, brown and rotting.

It's not real!

Tam smacked her head against the window. Once. Twice. Hard, then harder, eyes clenched shut. She forced her eyes open.

The monster was still there, staring at her. A big crystalline drop of saliva ran down one long, sharp fang. The thing didn't move. Just that drop of drool, that spiraled down its fang. Tam's breathing hitched in her chest with every breath. Fear left her frozen. Her blood sang through her veins, pricking and tingling like electricity.

She turned her head. Her neck creaked. Kevin--

He looked normal. Bloody, grinning, but normal. No fangs, no vampire-eyes. Smooth, pre-adolescent skin.

“Even if I'm not here,” he said. “It is. And it's going to get you.”

“Shut up.”

The monster remained. The gaping, dinosaur-like mouth closed slowly. It leaned closer to the window, where its hot breath fogged up the glass in rhythmic puffs.

“It'll eat you slow. One part at a time. Then it'll lick up your blood.” Kevin demonstrated by swirling his own tongue around his lips.

Tam took a deep breath. He had to shut up. She couldn't take any more of his violent threats. Couldn't deal with the fear anymore. Enough was enough was enough. “Shut up. Now.”

“My mom's going to watch it eat you. Maybe it won't eat you all up. Maybe it'll eat out your insides and then use your body to hold its baby. You killed Jake-O, so it needs to have another one.”

Tam lashed out and hit him, sending his head crashing against the window.

He didn't move.

Oh God, had she killed him?

“Kevin?”

She nudged his shoulder. He didn't move. But he was breathing, she saw, she her concern faded somewhat. As long as he was breathing. His eyeballs twitched back and forth behind his eyelids. That was good, right?

Ignoring the thing outside her window, she cranked the car and jammed it into gear. The drive to town was one she hated, dreaded. It would be ten minutes or more, even going sixty, before she saw another house.

God forbid they ever need help out there.

Re-Cycle

2009-05-02T21:10:00.000-07:00

This is one of those really awesome Thai flicks. Thailand is putting out better and better work! I mean, their horror/dark fantasy movies have always seemed to make more sense to westerners than any of the other Asian...places...movies. Okay, so I hope you know what I mean. So I just watched Re-Cycle.

Re-Cycle is one of those movies that belong to the newly-named 'metafiction' genre, where the story is about the author, the author is a character, or the story revolves around the author's story, or story-in-a-story type things.

It's about an author, Ting-yin, who is celebrating the movie premiere of her bestsellings romance novels by stressing out over her latest book, a venture into the supernatural. She says, at the press conference for the movie, "I want to experience the supernatural."

An old boyfriend comes back into town, and she's extremely bitter about it. We don't know why just yet. About this time, the cinematography and special effects start to happen. Awesome, just lemme say. The movie is beautifully shot. The special effects and art design are absolutely amazing. I am scouring the internet for stills from this movie, it looks that awesome.

The first part of the movie, when Ting-yin begins to have her paranormal experiences, is great. The jump scenes are perfectly placed. One of them even got a "HOLY FRIG!!" out of me, which is pretty rare these days.

So as Ting-yin begins to put two and two together-- what she writes is what she needs to do-- she starts to, well, do what she writes. This means getting into the elevator of her apartment building. She notices right off the posh, expensive buildings has changed.

From here on, I was mesmerized. This movie honestly has some of the best graphics I have ever seen. The special effects were handled with such care that I wasn't turned off by a single corny trick. And did I mention it's asbolutely beautiful? The surreal aspect of this movie rocks. It's a bizarre mix of Neverending Story, Silent Hill 4, Alice in Wonderland, Labyrinth, Pan's Labyrinth What Dreams May Come and a few other films.

The description has this listed as a horror film. although it has some kick-butt jump scenes, some really disturbing imagery, and the requisite long-haired faceless Asian ghost (whose later special effects completely redeem this doesn't-quite-belong-in-this-film-character), it's definitely more of a dark fantasy than a horror movie. There is some content that may affect hormonal, sensitive people (like myself. I cried a couple of times. But I have a documented medical screwed-up-hormone condition LOL, so results not typical).

The only thing that made this movie slightly not perfect is the very last two minutes. I'm sure it's because something was lost in the translation, and it is sort of explained in the movie, but not fully, and just a little bit more would have straightened out the confusion.

Still, it's not enough to keep me from watching this movie again! As I said, it's absolutely BEAUTIFUL.

A great new review and an embarrassing injury!

2008-10-11T17:17:00.001-07:00

Choate Road reviewed Spirit-Mother!

I vaguely remember this bizarre conversation in the hotel bar in Ohio with a guy with a LOT of blond hair. (remember, I was about six vodka/cranberries in, with the tequila freely flowing). We were in the, as Gregory Hall puts it, the Verizon Wireless crowd of drunken writers and fans, so after the blond guy (whose name I finally managed to find out was Jim) kept asking me, "Are you a Gators fan?" I think he asked me like four times. I kept saying no and sloshing back shots of tequila. I don't remember exactly when or how, but I ended up in a really dark corner of the bar with Matt, Robin, Jim, Jason Keene and two awesome Ohio chicks, Courtney and Beth. Jim found out I was a writer, or I was babbling about my book, or something, and offered to review my book.

I didn't have any print copies (still don't, damn it) so I told him I could send him a copy of Spirit-MOther in PDF.

Long story short, I did, and he reviewed it!

Here's the link:

http://www.choateroad.com/reviews.htm

I love it!

The book is available at

http://search.barnesandnoble.com/Spirit-Mother/Adra-Steia/e/9781934678985/?itm=1

I also had a very embarrassing injury today...I was in a new store, trying on shoes. They happened to be this pair of fire-engine red stilleto heels. Very cute. So not me. Six inch high heels and super-klutz don't mix! Anyway, I got one of my feet into one shoe (wasn't easy...I swear my feet just aren't shaped for fancy schmancy shoes!) and was trying to cram my other foot in. I stumbled, hopped, caught my balance, and decided to give up that venture.

When I stepped down out of the one shoe I'd managed to get on, my other leg cramped up really bad. After a couple of steps, I realized I'd managed to pull a muscle. Trying on shoes. That's about as bad as when I gave myself a black eye waxing my eyebrows!!

Black House by King/Straub

2008-10-10T18:07:00.001-07:00

I'm trying so hard to find things to do that don't involve some really complicated homework!!

I just finished Black House. This is an awesome book, despite the LOOONNNGG boring first part. I love it when King revisits his Dark Tower world. I loved the short story in the Room 1408 compilation, about the Little Sisters. That sort of world really sparks my imagination and makes me want to write more dark fantasy. I delved into this genre with Dark Consort, and I'd really love to write more of it. Who has time...Between the kids, the job, the art, college, and life in general, I barely have times to eat, sleep, and shower! I have way too many projects waiting in something similar to Purgatory.

Anyway, back to Black House. Apparently this book is related to The Talisman. I don't know...haven't rread that one yet! Planning on it though, definitely. I keep picking it up in Walmart and putting it back down.

I like Stephen King's dark fantasy stuff. These days, I like it a lot more than his horror. Sometimes his horror novels are sort of flat and formulaic. Even though the story is mostly well-told, it just doesn't grab you the way you want it to. I hate to say it, but his writing seems slightly dated sometimes. With the Dark Towers books, you can't help but get involved.

I'm choking on the too-strong scent of 'sex on the beach' wax buttons. (Ya know, the little parrafin and oil gizmos you toss into an oil burner or tart burner and heat up? They melt and smell real good!). So I'm going to blow out the tea lights and try to get the girls corralled into their bedroom, at least.

Then on to that blasted homework........

The Signal (movie)

2008-10-07T05:43:00.000-07:00

I'd heard this movie was horrible. Boring. Dumb. Pointless.

I watched it a while back and realized pretty quickly that the people who say that about the movie can usually be described by at least two of the words I just used.

You can't watch that movie thinking you're going to be watching some formulaic horror movie. It's really a movie that you can't label. The first part of the movie is sort of slow, but sublte. About the time you're going to turn it off, you realize something is about to happen that you need to see. Abruptly it segues into the second part of the movie (it is actually broken up into three parts) and suddenly you're thrust into this lightening-fast WTF-inducing very dark, very twisted whose-line-is-it-type black comedy situation. You don't know who's crazy. You don't know if anyone actually is or if its just human nature. The social commentary during this point is spot-on and occasionally cuts pretty deep. And it's really funny. Some great one-liners and obvious-answer type stuff.

The third part is like turning a sharp right after going straight at 100 miles an hour. You've suddenly got emotions and a twist that I really didn't 100% grasp, although I understand what on a basic level (if that makes sense LOL). The characters, some of which have been really shallow and 2-D show some depth and development.

Definitely a movie to see--if you're not going to take it too seriously and can think outside the modern Hollywood box!

waaaay behind!!!

2008-10-07T05:39:00.000-07:00

I'll be catching up here, later tonight. I have some stuff to post from conTEXT and just some of the usual info! I really need to start using this blog more...

Freaky cartoon

2008-06-19T18:22:00.001-07:00

That is highly freaky. And supposedly it came from a kids' claymation version of some sort of Mark TWain thing. It's...wow. Wierd. But...cool.

Spirit-Mother is finally available!!!!!

2008-06-15T07:30:00.000-07:00

I'm so excited! I could do a dance. But...that wouldn't be advisable. So I'm not, I'm just going to mass-spam-comment myspace, bebo, and bookplace.

heehee...you were warned.

Anyway, here's the 'buy now' link

Spirit-Mother:Devotion

If you read further down in my blog, I have an excerpt posted!

Booksigning results from last week

2008-06-14T11:11:00.000-07:00

I had a booksigning in Clearwater last week. It was interesting...I sat next to Tiva Wallon and this other crazy lady. Not crazy like me and Tiva are, but crazy in a wierd, we-should-probably-move-down-some way. She wrote like education children's books about dogs and groundhogs and Olympic torches. She also has this fascination with the horrors of China and their influence on American consumerism and products. She lectured and lectured and lectured about anything made in China. Her dog died from Chinese dog food, so all Chinese people are bad, bad, bad. We laughed SO hard at her sometimes. She hated it when my stuff would touch hers. When I sat down and pulled out my books, I thought she was going to pass out. She told me my cover was distasteful and an insult to literature, and my promo stuff was too offensive for to sit next to. Said I should move. I told her, no, I arranged to sit with Tiva from the very beginning, and she could move. I respect my elders, but...she was too abrasive and that sort of made those defensive shields of mine spring up.

Anyway, her favorite thing to do was the leap up and grab whatever Asian person came through the doors and lecture them on the evils of Chinese dog food. She did it to about seven people. DIdn't sell them any chinese dog food doggie-victim books, either.

Me and Tiva had a good time, cracking up and gabbing and making fun of random people. We did better than average on sales (we both know what that means LOL).

Which leads me to something else.

Kids are attracted to my book. The cover is like a magnet for the 13-15 set for some reason. I can't explain it. Up until now, my social responsibility alarm would go off when a kid wanted the book, and I'd tell them their mom/dad had to come look at it first. Then I realized, I'm NOT that kid's mama or daddy. If they want to let their kid wander around a packed B&N all alone, that's their problem. I'm not going to be their censor. Now, if the kid is obviously much younger than 13 or whatever, I won't let them buy the book. But if kid is willing to shell out $13.00 for a 200 page book, I'm going to let them. Let them get in trouble for buying it (if they have the sort of parent who cares--but honestly, if they were watchign what was happening in the first place, they wouldn't have let the kid pick up the book).

There is no erotic content in my books (except for one LOL) and the violence is akin to what you would see in a modern horror movie. I guess becuase it's described in words rather than pictures, it's slighlty different case, but over all...I'm not going to play censor. Mamas and Daddies, pay attention to your kids. I don't want dirty emails from you.

So I let teens by my book. Feels like a confession! I used to care about that stuff. Now...it's like...this kid isn't my responsibility. If a parent asks me if the book is decent--which happily, many do--I'll tell them, YOU decide. I'll show them the worse spots in the book and they can skim and figure it out themselves. Everybody has a different level of good and bad and even badder. Most parents buy the book and read it themselves. A few times, they put the book back and said, "Maybe in a couple years."

Which I agree with, and I'll tell them so. I wrote SWamp Baby for adults.

** Wierd fact about me. I never was allowed to watch rated R movies until I was 18 (and out of my parents' house). I never broke that rule either. So I never saw a real horror movie (i.e. not edited for content on TV) until I was 18, and that one was Blair Witch Project. I read horror though, from the time I was about 10 or 13 or so. I don't remember my exact age, but the book was Dean Koontz' The Funhouse and to this day, that is still one of my favorite books, and Koontz is my all time favorite author.

I win

2008-06-14T11:00:00.000-07:00

The prize for stupidity. Now, on a grand scale of things, it's pretty low, but I've had myself worked up in a tizzy about it.

I use Netflix. I don't rent movies from a brick-and-mortar store very often. I used to work right next to a little independent place that supplied my demanding diet of gruesome indie and asian horror flicks, but when I left that job, I left that store behind. Sort of sad. I was really good friends with the people who owned it. They forgave my multitudinous (I don't think that's a word...) late fees and always held new releases for me that they knew I would like.

Anyway, some of my students' parents gave me Blockbuster gift cards. I have an account with them, but 2 years ago I ran it up to like $50 overdue. There's a BB next to where I work, so I went and checked on my account, which was fine (yay) and rented 5 movies. I had seven, but then I realized that I had six horror movies and I thought maybe it might look a little disturbing so I put two back and got a movie for the kids LOL.

Anyway, I checked out and saw where one was due back on Sunday, the rest on Saturday. I was like...whoa. Really quick turnaround. So today I was like stressing about how to justify a trip way out int he boondocks to the BB next to where I work. Gas is expensive, and as a principle I refuse to go anywhere near where I work on weekends LOL.

So I was just about to give up and accept the late fees with grace, and I looked at the reciept again.

One movie IS due tomorrow. The others are due...

NEXT Saturday.

funny little things in kids' movies

2008-06-14T07:48:00.000-07:00

We all know about Disney and their little 'hidden mickeys'. You have the naked woman in the one movie about the mice...The Adventurers I think it's called?. The penis on the priest in Little Mermaid. The mice saying dirty things in Cinderella, the word SEX in the seeds and pollen in Lion King...

I was watching Bee Movie with my kids. In the scene where Barry Benson is buzzing at the court and the bee lawyer is next to him, the bee lawyer clearly mouths "What the fuck?"

heehee. The naughty immature kid in me is cracking up.

(myspace blogs seem to be down. Sucko.)

Movie Review: Otis

2008-06-13T23:18:00.000-07:00

Ok, this one rules. I loved it. You gotta see this one. It's hilarious. It's right up there next to "Behind the Mask: The Rise of LEslie Vernon" for me. It's funny, dark, twisted, and it's full of great one liners. The people in it did a GREAT job with this script. A lesser cast would have mangled it horribly.

The music is great too. In addition to some great 80's hits, it's got a really good score too.

Make sure you watch the extra footage!

Movie Review: The Attic

2008-06-13T22:52:00.000-07:00

Welll......

I did it again. I picked a real winner. I'm a sucker for haunted house stories, so I figured I could find SOMETHING to like about this one.

Nope.

Here's the main gist of the movie.

"Dad, I see someone who looks just like me. Do I have a twin?"

"No, you don't have a twin, daughter."

"Boyfriend-who- is- conveniently- a- cop- and- plays- one- on- TV- too, find out if I have a twin sister."

"Yes, hatchet-faced-anorexic-who-I will-definitely-regret-kissing-later, you have a twin sister who died at birth because she was deformed and your dad let her die, and guess what she's haunting you and I've brought back an expert who can interpret these 'wicca' symbols that have no other name than 'wicca symbols' because this movie wasn't researched thoroughly and we're desperate for any sort of scene were I can lower my head and look at you through lowered eyelashes because I really want to be a soap opera star."

So. That's the movie in a nutshell. One second the broad is nutso and talking like a demented 5 year old, and the next she's an eloquent sexhound who refuses to eat for no apparent reason.

I don't get it. None of it. There are undertones of sexual molestation by her father. Well its pretty much implied that some nasty abuse went on. I don't get the fact that she's 25 and still living at home with mommy and daddy and retarded brother and freaking out about....well, a long lost twin that feels way too much like a tacked on plot device. Super-tacked on, like they made the movie, realized it was crapola, and shot a few scenes with airy whispers and vintage dresses and the female lead in black eyeliner. There's little to no explanations--adequate or otherwise-- for anything. Of course there's this whole "which one is really the evil twin" thing going on, and is the boyfriend real or not. The perfectly coiffed hair says no.

I guess my biggest problem is there is no descent. She's normal one minute, then next off her rocker. Emma just doesn't develop. She's crazy all of a sudden. Must be those 'wicca symbols'.

Over all, it's supposed to be about a girl who is screwed up mentally who believes her fantasies are real. Multiple personality disorders, and a serving of 'asian ghost curse'.

And she's ugly.

Why I love Mrs. Giggles

2008-06-11T17:41:00.001-07:00

Why I love Mrs. Giggles
She could tear me a new one, and then do vile things to the old one, and I'd still love this woman and her blog. I am proudly her fawning fan-girl.

Borrowed from Mrs. Giggles.blogspot.com.

I am not responsible for your drinking habits. You are a grown-up, you should watch out for your own alcohol intake. Also, there are some references that may be dated by the time you read this, so for the record, this particular rambling thing is put up on 17 May 2007.

**Ash's note-- this is old, obviously, but it fits every single dang blog drama!**

Cast of Characters
"Anonymous" - 1 sip per appearance.
Someone who posts her alleged full name and then berates everyone else for being a cowardly anonymous cur - 2 sips.
The "Why Can't We Get Along?" Pollyanna - 3 sips.
The angry woman who uses a cuss word at least five times in a six-word sentence - 2 sips.
Clueless man who wanders into the discussion and makes snide comments about fighting bitches - 1 sip.
Clueless man who wanders into the discussion and proceeds to launch into a completely unrelated diatribe about what trash romance novels are - 2 sips.
Clueless man who wanders into the discussion to tell everyone to read "real" literature... like Clive Cussler - 5 sips.
Clueless feminist who shows up and proceeds to launch into a completely unrelated diatribe about how romance set back the movement - 7 sips.
Jayne and Jane from Dear Author join the fray - 11 sips.
Karen Scott joins the fray - 11 sips.
Dionne Galace (Bam) joins the fray - 11 sips.
Emily Veinglory joins the fray - 11 sips.
Jane, Karen, Bam, and Emily Veinglory in the house - 50 sips.
Those ladies and Nora Roberts in the house - drink until everything turns dark.

The Plot
"You're jealous" - 2 sips.
"Your jealous" - 5 sips.
"You're not qualified to say anything unless you're a published author." - 3 sips.
An argument about how too much sex is spoiling the genre - 2 sips.
An argument about "porn" versus "erotic romance" and how so-and-so are writing "erotic romance" instead of porn - 3 sips.
Said argument comes from an author whose books you thought had too much sex and not enough romance - 4 sips.
The great Virgin Or Not debate - 2 sips.
The neverending Mean Book Reviewers debate - 3 sips.
Someone crying that making fun of book covers is a terrible thing to do because authors have no control over book covers and therefore... er, something, I suppose - 4 sips.
That person writes for or is a cheerleader for Changeling Press - 18 sips.
Someone moaning that we are hurting the author's feelings - 5 sips.
This same person proceeds to call everyone all kinds of bad things for being such a meanie (apparently your feelings don't count as much as the author's) - 7 sips.
Laura Kinsale/Mary Balogh fan whining that there is nothing as good to read as their beloved authors - 10 sips.
These same people inadvertently reveal that they rarely read anything else in the first place - 12 sips.
Readers moaning that the genre is too formulaic - 2 sips.
These same readers ripping apart a book that does not fit into their definition of "romance" - 1 mug.
Readers complaining that there are not enough overweight or homely heroines - 3 sips.
Readers shrieking in horror when they come across an overweight or homely hero in their romance novels - 2 mugs.
Readers acting as if a hero sporting a tattoo/facial hair/smoking habit has personally showed up to pull a Steve Morgan on their behinds - 5 sips.
Pollyanna shows up during a discussion to tell people they should all play nice - 7 sips.
Her post has at least seven ";)", "lol", "*ggg*", ":)", and other variations of such things in each paragraph - 8 sips.
She actually uses those annoying jumping round smilie things - 19 sips per smilie.
Someone shows up to deliver an epic rant as to why she has no opinion on the topic of discussion and therefore she does not want to say anything about it - 9 sips.
Someone flounces, saying that she's just said her last word and she's never coming back - 10 sips.
Two posts below, there's a post with similar wording echoing her opinions posted under "Anonymous" - 13 sips.
Conversation gets completely derailed as people start arguing over the definition of a word - 4 sips.
Someone mentions "Nazi", "Jew", "Holocaust", "Jesus", "Satan", and "God" - 3 sips.
Five different "Anonymous" arguing ferociously with one "Mrs Cherie Blossom who has the guts to sign her name instead of hiding behind an anonymous name" over the merits of anonymous posting, which has nothing to do with the initial topic - 7 sips.
You wonder why, if Cherie Blossom is so high and mighty about using her alleged real name, you have never come across her until the moment she shows up to take down Anonymous People everywhere in Blogsville - 16 sips.
Someone taking a post personally in a bizarre way and starts going all TMI to defend herself, for example taking offense at a harmless statement like "I hear in China they eat dogs" and start delivering long speeches about how she loves dogs and she is Chinese and therefore nobody has any right to make such ridiculous sweeping statements since she is an exception to the rule and therefore it invalidates the statement - 10 sips.
And she won't listen even if you have photographic evidence that they really do eat dogs in China - 12 sips.
When confronted with accusations of wrong-doings, the accused starts going TMI about the house that burned down, the crossdressing alcoholic pedophile husband who needs bail, the kids who are on drugs, the IRS that stole all their money, and more - 19 sips.
Or she can be less dramatic and says that she's had a heart attack or something which is why she couldn't get back to everyone - 25 sips.
Which culminates in a post by a "friend" telling everyone that the poor dear died in some kind of accident - 28 sips.
Discussion of a review of an African-American romance turns into a session of making fun of the cover because clearly nobody has read the book or intends to - 27 sips.

Celebrity Guest Appearances
Monica Jackson blogs about racism - 4 sips.
A chorus of "Oh no, you didn't!" responses from people who proceed to deliver epic rants on why they are not like what Monica Jackson talks about - 16 sips.
Roslyn Holcomb and Karen Scott get into an argument during that discussion - 15 sips.
Nora Roberts shows up in a discussion, makes a wonderfully sane statement, and everyone else falls onto the ground to worship her - 18 sips.
And then the discussion turns into how awesome her books are - 26 sips.
Someone then "jokes" about Nora Roberts using clones or something to write her ten books per year - 15 sips.
Wait. That is a joke, right? You wonder... - 11 sips.
Nora Roberts makes a response about wanting to take over the world - 10 sips.
And you wonder what is wrong with you because you don't really like her books as much as everyone else apparently does - 31 sips.

I've succombed. damn lolcats

2008-06-09T17:14:00.001-07:00

more cat pictures

more cat pictures

more cat pictures

more cat pictures

more cat pictures

more cat pictures

more cat pictures

more cat pictures

more cat pictures

more cat pictures

more cat pictures

Toaster Slap! A movie review of "Inside"

2008-06-06T22:24:00.000-07:00

Yikes.

Not sure if French horror is getting better...or worse. Or, EVEN worse-- not sure if it's even changing at all!

I watched "Inside" tonight. "Inside" is the story of a horse-faced french chick (lordie she's ugly! LOL) who's husband is killed in a car wreck that she's terribly injured in as well. She's immensely pregnant at the time of the wreck. I mean, she looks full term. But they flash foward four months, and she's still even more immensely pregnant. I guess the director never saw a pregnant woman before and imagined that at six months, slender-built pregnant women look like they are over term with quadruplets. At 'nine months' the chick is all...lumpy-pregnant. Her name is Sarah.

Anyway, Sarah is a day away from having her baby. She goes home from a doc's appointment and is terrorized by a tall, skinny Angelina-Jolie-with-over-collagenized-lookalike. The police come, find nobody, go away, and the girl wakes up in bed with a pair of scissors sticking out of her belly. Nice, huh?

From there, the story stops. She gets into the bathroom, and the bad girl and the ugly girl sit on opposites sides of the bathroom door and breathe at each other for a while. The obligatory late night guests show up, die horribly via knitting needles, long shiny shears, falls down stairs, and smothering (only two guests, believe it or not). The police come to check on the ugly girl, and die overly dramatic deaths. The cat dies an overly dramatic death.

The bathroom door dies an overly dramatic death.

Things this movie has:

1. Foot long shiny scissors that honestly serve no purpose in a modern household.
2. convenient items to make weapons with, with placement that makes NO sense whatsoever.
3. dumb cops.
4. obligatory visitors.
5. lots of stabbings in the eyes.
6. everybody character walks away with a slashed/stabbed jugular! Nobody's a loser on "Inside"!
7. Toaster slaps. (the best scene. Ugly girl gets whapped upside the head with a toaster.)
8. lots and lots and lots of geyser-like jugular slashings.
9. Enough blood to float a small boat. Luckily it's all contained to the hallway and the bathroom.
10. computer generated fetuses
11. and best yet, homemade spears

I didn't get how this ugly girl--who is a sturdy looking woman--can't get the upperhand on this tall, skinny, droopy-lipped chick. She had a million chances to beat her. I don't get why she didn't verbally warn her guests and the cops. I don't understand why this ugly chick didn't have a SINGLE likeable quality. She was depressed, mean, ugly, and a coward.

It was sort of cool when she gave herself a tracheotomy with a knitting needle. Then duct-taped the squirting hole closed. That was fairly interesting. Another cool point was when she was groping around the hallways through a hole in the bathroom door and the bad girl stabbed her through the hand and pinned it to the wall. I thought the senseless pet murder was, well, pointless.

I didn't like the movie too much. The characters were unlikeable. Totally unlikeable. I didn't care of the ugly girl died or not. I didn't care of the barely-explained villain got what she wanted.

It was like the director tried too hard, but gave up suddenly.

I mean, the gore is sort of interesting. It's probably the only decent thing in the movie. Horrible to say, but there's not much else to this movie. It just doesn't tie together neatly. It's very loose and leaves way too much open. I love artsy horror flicks and watch my share of them. This one, though...falls short.

Spirit-Mother: Devotion

2008-06-05T19:36:00.001-07:00

I finally got word that the sequel to Swamp Baby will release July 15, from Tease Publishing! I'd hoped it would come out in June.

I decided I'm going to do something special! When you buy a copy of Spirit-Mother from www.allromanceebooks.com, I'll send you a free copy of Undead Requiem or Dark Consort, which are my short stories. Undead Requiem is published by Tease Publishing and Dark COnsort is part of DCL's Deadly Sins anthology. Just send me the reciept showing you purchased SPirit-Mother and I'll email you your choice of the stories!

Here's an excerpt of Spirit-Mother: Devotion.

The key wasn’t in his house. Anywhere. He’d searched it from top to bottom. Ripped out drawers and dumped them out in the middle of the floor. Empties cabinets and boxes, checked between the couch cushions. It wasn’t there.

The girl in the hospital had to have it, then. As much as Derry hated to go back, he needed that key. He needed Broken Drum’s dream journals. Maybe Broken Drum would have another key. Hertley’s Swamp was closer than the hospital. Check there first, and if that was a bust, then he would go deal with the crazy chick.

He forced himself to wait until mid-morning to drive the long road to Hertley. After flashing his ID as a resident of Hertley, the military guard let him through the gate. Every mile or so, the state had posted big warning signs on the razor-wire-topped, seven-foot-high fence that lined both sides of the road twenty miles from the swamp. Derry had heard rumors that the fence completely surrounded Hertley.

Nobody knew how many of the so-called ‘swamp cannibals’ lived out in the preserved land. The Swamp Baby had been shut down, like all the other businesses on that stretch of river. Even river travel was banned. Luckily, the river was small and not much more than a third-rate tourist attraction. He’d closed the Swamp Baby right after the government moved their armed forces in. Not being able to sell to his competition had burned him financially, but not so badly he couldn’t recover. The government had offered to buy homes and businesses in Hertley so the residents would move out, but only the younger residents had accepted the pittance and left. The older ones were stubborn old coots who didn’t care if the devil himself walked out of the swamp.

It was their land, their pappies’ land, their pappies’ pappies’ land, and they wasn’t leaving!
Broken Drum slipped under the radar, since he didn’t own property or have a driver’s license.
He still squatted on Suwannee’s land.

Main Street was quiet, nearly deserted. The salon was closed, the windows boarded over and bright signs warning against trespassing. The same went for the convenience store and the mini-mart.

The storefront daycare was still open, although when Derry glanced in the window as he drove past, he only saw a glimpse of a couple of kids with a single adult. The woman looked out as he drove past.

He saw her face for just an instant. At the moment he turned his attention to the road, a dog bolted in front of his car and met a painful death beneath the wheels of his Honda.

Two or three people emerged from the remaining businesses on Main Street. Grizzled old men came out of the hardware store and a middle-aged woman edged out of the diner. The woman came out of the daycare.

Grimacing, Derry got out and looked back at the mangled mutt on the asphalt. Blood spread in a crescent around its body, mingling with the oil and exhaust coating the dusty pavement.

Iridescent swirls glittered in the dark red blood. The dog’s hind leg twitched once, twice before going still.

“Damn it,” he muttered. He looked around at the few people on the sidewalk. They stared at the corpse, mesmerized. The blood spread further and further than Derry thought possible.
Everything was absolutely silent. Even the new dinging crosswalk signals that the town had put in six years ago were quiet. Nobody said a word.

“Um, anybody know who’s dog it was?” Derry asked. Chill bumps rose on his arms. The hair on the back of his neck stood up. Suppressing a shudder, he rubbed his hands up and down his arms briskly. “Anybody? It’s got a collar on.”

When no one answered him for the second time, Derry got a little freaked out.

“Okay, I guess I’ll just take a look.”

The five spectators inched forward, craning their necks so they could see from the curb.

Sickos.

Derry squatted next to the broken, dead dog. Poor thing. He wasn’t an animal lover, but nothing deserved to die this way, nearly bent in half at such an impossible angle. Sightless damaged eyes stared up at him. The guts hung out of the ruptured belly. Gingerly he reached out one hand for the gleaming silver tag hanging from the collar. A millisecond before he touched the metal, the dog snapped at his hand, the bloody teeth skinning the outer edge of his palm.

Derry hollered out in fright and scuttled backwards.

The dog was dead. Dead!

Yet it snarled and barked and snapped in his direction like it was rabid. It tried to twist its broken, twisted hind legs around, but something was wrong with its back as well.

Shit. Something was really, really, fucking really wrong with Hertley. The people on the sidewalk were watching in fascination. Even the kids in the daycare were clustered at the window, watching him with eerie cold eyes.

And that damn dog had managed to scoot six inches closer, leaving a trail of slimy, bloody, smelly guts behind it. The front legs had escaped traumatic injury, but from the middle of the animal’s back on, the hind legs were pointed at the sky, the back dragging on the ground. The split in the belly gaped open every time the dog moved.

Derry got sick on the road, puked up his breakfast and his lunch. Somebody laughed, a soft titter.

He felt a presence behind him and smelled a familiar perfume, one he hadn’t smelled in over five years.

Suwannee’s favorite scent.

Hands brushed the top of his head and squeezed his shoulders. Derry closed his eyes and inhaled her clean, sweet scent. Both of her hands were so warm through his vintage-wash t-shirt.

“Holata,” she whispered in his ear. “Holata.”

“What?” he turned around to see her, but there wasn’t anyone there, only the idiots on the sidewalk and the gruesome snarling thing a few feet away from him.

Derry clambered to his feet and sidestepped the dog. It snapped at him, frenzied. Ignoring it, he got in his car and floored it toward the turn-off that led to Suwannee’s. He glanced back in his rear-view mirror and thought he was going to get sick again.

They were eating the dog.

Eating it right where it lay in the street.

Fighting over the remains, the daycare worker handing out bits and bloody pieces to the children who had filed out of the center. Each one wore a gruesome grin.

Derry couldn’t hold it back anymore. He slammed on the brakes and leaned out the window, hurling up the remainders of what he’d eaten.

Dear God, he thought. It was a true prayer, wordless, fervent. Get me the heck out of here in one piece.

****

He sped through town, not stopping for anything or anybody. The turn-off came up quick and it felt like he took it on two wheels. The road out to Suwannee’s hadn’t been grated in a long time, so his car jounced around uncontrollably.

Duh, slow down, idiot, he thought to himself. It took a lot of pep-talking to get his lead foot to lighten up a little.

It had only been a year since he’d been back to Hertley. It had almost seemed normal then!

Nobody ate dead dogs. Nobody that he knew of, anyway.

He pulled up to Suwannee’s old house and jumped out of the car, not even bothering to shut off the engine. Broken Drum didn’t answer when he beat on the front door.

“Drum! I’m coming in.” Using his copy of the key, he pushed the front door open. The smell hit him first, the rancid, pungent smell of the freaks he and Michael had encountered in the swamp.

“Drum, are you here?” Terrified, lit by adrenaline, he grabbed the polished oak walking stick and hefted it to his shoulder. His bones seemed to tremble within his flesh. Okay, okay, calm down.
You’ve taken enough karate classes to know how to defend yourself.

Michael wasn’t here to beat the cannibals off with an old shovel. Cautiously, almost numb from the hormones racing through his body, he advanced through the living room.

Whatever had happened here had happened very recently. The feces on the floor looked fresh.

Grimacing, he stepped over the sporadic piles of crap as he made his way to the bedroom. Drum had left Suwannee’s room untouched and taken the tiny back room as his own. Bracing himself, he twisted the loose doorknob and pushed.

The old man was there, in the bed. A bloody sheet covered him from the waist down. Weirdest of all, an IV stand stood next to the bed, a bag of clear fluid dangling from the thin metal arms.

“Drum?” Derry asked softly, entering the room. “Hey, Drum?”

The old man moaned softly. He looked thin and weak, pale as the original color of the grimy, blood-stained bedsheets beneath him.

Derry’s blood thundered in his ears and he took a step forward and pulled the sheet away.

He gagged miserably and crouched on his heels, head in his hands.

They’d been at him, the cannibals. God, let it be the cannibals and not some psycho.

The IV bag loudly proclaimed it wasn’t the primitive swamp cannibals. Swamp cannibals didn’t know how to insert IV’s. They wouldn’t have used the figure-eight-shaped sticky pads to hold it in place. There wouldn’t be a blood pressure cuff on the floor by the bed, or a stethoscope hung over the headboard.

Derry managed to fight off his urge to puke and went over to the IV stand. Whatever was in there was helping to keep Drum alive, and hopefully sedated.

Terrible things had been done to his legs and his stomach. Derry gulped back a mouthful of bitter saliva and steeled his stomach. Quickly, he untied Drum’s hands from the headboard, noting how icy cold and gray they were. He’d been tied up for a long time, long enough to cut off circulation to his hands.

Derry folded them gently on the sagging barrel-chest and yanked a clean sheet out of the closet.

Nobody had messed with Suwanee’s clothes. The gust of air that whispered against his face when he yanked the thin wooden door open made his gut clench. It smelled like her, soft and feminine and sweet.

The odor of death and sickness hadn’t invaded that space yet. Derry closed the door.

A second later something heavy and hard slammed into the back of his head, not hard enough to knock him out, but hard enough to daze him. He bounced off the closet door and slid to the floor.

It was a struggle to turn around. “Doctor Reynold?”

The balding, ruddy-faced doctor, usually so jovial and friendly, sneered down at him. A mad light gleamed in his eyes. He had a baseball bat held against his shoulder, ready to swing again. Derry put a hand to the back of his head and felt the big bleeding knot.

“Doctor Reynolds, come on, put the bat down. It’s me, Derry.”

“I know who you are.” His voice was hoarse, like he’d been hollering for days on end.

Derry gripped his polished pine bough tightly, keeping it at his side and hoping the doctor hadn’t noticed it.

“Did-did you do that to Drum?” Derry pointed to the bed. “Why?”

“Meddling old man.” The doctor shrugged and tightened his grip on the bat. “And I was hungry. It’s a sickness, you know. We bathe in the river and she gives it to us.”

“That doesn’t sound real nice of her. Who’s ‘her’?” Derry tightened his own grip. A cramp shot through his palm, a reminder of what Suwannee had done to him five years earlier.

“Spirit-Mother. She’s taken Hertley. She loves us.”

“I bet.”

“Michael’s back, too. Have you seen him yet?” The doctor let the bat relax. A shadow of his former self, mangled by whatever possessed him now, glimmered through.

Derry felt sick to the souls of his feet. “Michael’s dead, Doctor Reynolds. I saw his body myself. I saw Suwannee cut his throat.”

The doctor shrugged. “Spirit-Mother won’t let us die, Derry. Even when we want to so bad we can’t stand it.” He held his wrists out to Derry.

Deep, black-edged gashes loosely closed with butterfly stitches oozed dark red fluid. The stink of infection made Derry lean back, grimacing. “Leave, then. Get out of Hertley. Why do you stay here?”

The doctor moved like a whirlwind, fast and strong, picking Derry up and slinging him a few feet away. The pine bough rolled out of his reach.

Damn it!

Derry huddled against the wall, searching for a weapon. The doctor was going a little more crazy, bashing the drywall with the bat like he intended to tear down the house with just that one tool.

There! Under the bed was a hacksaw, the edge gleaming in the afternoon sunlight shining in from the single window. He wasn’t sure how much good a rusty hacksaw would be against a baseball bat, but it was something.

Just then the doctor whipped around and began to bash the crap out of the lacy shadows of leaves dancing on the wall. Derry snapped his arm out, painfully hyper-extending his elbow as he snatched up the pine bough.

On his feet, he was swinging the bough at the doctor’s head before the man could even turn around.

Derry hit him hard. Hard enough to slam the man against the wall, shatter his nose in a gush of blood, and knock him out.

Only after he’d slumped to the floor and Derry had delivered one more blow to the base of the doc’s skull did he turn back to Broken Drum. Before the doctor could awaken—if he was actually going to—Derry grabbed the clean sheet and covered Drum with it. The old man didn’t so much as twitch. After grabbing the IV bag, Derry braved the filth and slid his arms under his friend.
Thanks to the horrible things the doctor had done to him, Drum’s deadweight wasn’t unmanageable. Derry staggered out the front door, nearly falling headfirst down the narrow, shaky stairs.

A wild wind whipped through his hair and made the sheet hanging off Drum’s mutilated body flap and snap angrily. Over the roar of the wind through the pines and oaks, Derry heard a sound that chilled him to the core.

The low, rumbling growl blended perfectly with the sound of the wind.

Frantic now, Derry stumbled as fast as he could to the car. He got the back door open and pushed Drum in, hooking the IV bag on the hanger hook above the door. Straightening up, he scanned the woods surrounding the house.

The shadows flickered, driving him crazy as he tried to look everywhere at once.

“Just get in the damn car, idiot,” he grunted to himself. Derry slammed the back door after he made sure no part of Broken Drum hung out. Rather than walk around the car, he crawled into the driver’s seat through the passenger side.

The keys weren’t in the ignition.

He’d left the car running.

Damn that crazy doctor! He must have taken the keys.

Groaning, Derry popped his door open and scrambled back up the porch, into the house.
The doctor was awake, beating on the walls again. Derry ducked back out on to the porch. Silently he ran through every curse word he knew, hands fisted at his sides as he leaned against the side of the house.

He scanned the porch for a weapon that would be formidable against the solid-wood baseball bat.

There were the aluminum-frame lawn chairs, the wobbly pedestal table, and a crate full of whiskey bottles, ready for recycling. Drunk or not, Drum did what he could for the environment.

Derry stifled a hysterical laugh. Get it together, Leander. He shifted his foot. His heel touched something hard and cold, something that rapped against the wall behind him softly. He glanced down, his heart racing with expectation.

Hallelujah! A crowbar! Maybe somebody was looking out for him after all…

Derry picked the long heavy piece of metal up and hefted it. It disturbed him, just a little bit, that the thought of using it on a person didn’t bother him one bit. The muscles in his arms and back tightened, tensed.

He took a deep breath and reached for the crusty brass doorknob.

The doctor was in the living room, bashing the hell out of the walls with his bat. He looked at Derry, the crazy-light in his eyes blazing. With a roar, the doctor rushed him, the bat held out like a lance.

I have issues....

2008-06-05T17:53:00.001-07:00

I live in an apartment complex that is uber-strict about everything. I've had over a dozen eviction notices, from everything from making too much noise (which is reasonable) to 'littering' the top of my washer and dryer (that means I had ONE full bottle of detergent and one that still had enough for a load or two and a wad of dryer lint). Once I got one because at some point one of my kids put her hand on the wall and it left a mark like UNDER the banister downstairs and I'm 5'6, and just it was way below my line of sight.

Anyway, we had inspections today. I cleaned my apartment thoroughly and it's been a while. I'm a clutter bug and pack rat. If it's reusable in ANY way, I save it. Problem is, I run out of space to cram stuff, so baskets and cabinets and stuff overflow. I don't mind doing laundry, but I hate folding it, so it usually piles up on the couches (I have three of them crammed into a TINY 2 bedroom apartment). Well, last night I cleaned the apartment. I took out seven bags of stuff that I know I'll never use, even though it KILLEd me to throw out some of it because I just KNOW I can reuse it in someway LOL. I started going through the clothes--to just give you an idea of how long its been since I folded the piles of clothes in the bedroom, my seven year old has grown out of clothing I found LOL.

I cleaned off the counters of all the baskets and boxes and bowls and other things that its easy to toss stuff in. I emptied out cabinets that wouldn't shut. I even reorganized the pantry. My closet door will shut now. I tucked all thw wires to my computer set up back behind the desk and the table next to it.

I stacked up all my DVDs, books, CD's, and notes. I put all my art supplies in a basket.

I swept the carpets, then vacuumed them. I scrubbed the glass topped table top (a nightmare, really).

I scrubbed out the sink, the bathtubs (not a bad job, I do keep up with the basic housekeeping LOL), the toilets.

SO when I went to bed last night, I really didn't think about it. I got up, went to work, came home and nearly freaked out. My first thought was seriously, "Oh my gosh, somebody's been in my house."

Then I was like...ohhhhhhh. I did a really good job last night. LOL

I usually use Myspace blogs...

2008-06-05T17:14:00.000-07:00

Then I realized that not everyone can read it. So I'm blogging here now, and cross-posting to Myspace. Specialness abounds.